立春

Beginning of spring.

In an attempt to write more often, I’ve decided to post on the solar terms. Since I’m not super knowledgeable about dates or the history behind old calendars, I’ll be limited to writing about my personal observations. Which is pretty much what I usually do. I’m predicting that I’m going to end up posting within one day of the actual observed term in EST/EDT, and ramble for a few paragraphs every half month until coming to the conclusion that I have nothing exceptionally interesting or new to offer. I’m of the belief that writing something is better than writing nothing… thus I’ve decided to embark on this posting schedule experiment.

Although the name of this term is the beginning of spring, it’s still very Winter here in Toronto. There’s a snow and ice alert for the next few days, and the wind still freezes my face after thirty minutes outside. Back home there’s also an extraordinary surplus of snow, too. There seems to be an abundance of coldness around the world recently (interpret that as you’d like), and I wish we could fast-forward just a little bit. To warmer weather, to spring. Personally, I just think it’d be nice. I don’t favour one season over another, aside from a small preference for summer simply because of my birthday.

Speaking of celebrated days, Chinese New Year was a few weeks ago. It’s the second one I spent apart from my family. Holidays spent away from home makes it feel like it never happened, and I lose my sense of time. How long has it been since I sat at home? When was the last time I saw this person? Do they feel the same loss of time? I can’t tell if it’s been a long time or a short time. My sense of self has always been fairly stable, so at the very innermost, I feel as if I haven’t changed a day since becoming conscious of my existence. If I haven’t changed at all, then how can I tell the passage of time? It just seems like everything else is moving forwards quickly, and I am being swept up in it. Not as an omniscient observer, but more like a little creature in a boat, holding on for dear life.

Well, that’s not really a bad thing. It would be unfortunate if I was the type of person who had a specific goal in life, striving hard to reach it, battling the strong currents. As it is, I’m free to wander as I wish… as long as I don’t fall off the boat and drown.

Anyway! It’s the start of a new year. Technically, the year can start whenever you want it to. If you reserve goal-making for January 1st, or your birthday, or the Monday of the week, you’ll never really start. So I’ll start this year on February 4th, in the space between classes where usually I would be grocery-shopping.

That’s all I have for now. Will report back in half a month.

Until then.